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961 of 1033 humans found the following review helpful.
Found this...
By MechYeti
...stuck into a stone while on vacation. I'm impressed with it, generally. Unfortunately, it turns out that removing it made me the new king of Switzerland, which is a lot of responsibility.
435 of 469 people found the following review helpful.
Bad Tooth Pick Placement
By MozartFX
It's a great knife, it's just that the toothpick is in the center of the knife so when you use it, it looks like your playing numerous kinda f'd up harmonica.
1431 of 1592 humans found the following review helpful.
Epic all-situation survivor's kit
By A. Gift For You
First of all, let me tell you a little in regards to myself and how I came to need such mystical tools of survival.
In the beginning, I was born from the ashes of Lincoln and Roosevelt then raised by Hemingway, a troop of firefighters, and werewolves. I was taught to fight evil of all forms from politics to the undead. I may tell you from experience, there has never been a tool half as utile as the Wenger - The Giant Knife. Let me give you a brief example from yesterday:
I woke up after my aweinspiring night's rest in the Wenger's king size murphy bed (with satin sheets). Once the women were dressed and out the door, I made coffee from the Wenger's cappuccino machine. Then I headed out the door, Wenger in hand.
I came all over a two old women retail crochet crosses. I pulled my Wenger out of my pants to get to my wallet. The ladies saw this and passed from physical life in ecstasy just at the size of my Wenger. Now Armed with two crochet crosses, I went to the cave.
This cave was the home of a 58 mouthed snake that looked more like a chainsaw blade than a snake. After journeying 5 miles on the Wenger's hoverboard, I reached the treasure surrounded by the serrated beast. I unfolded my 3 Spartan army and easy bake oven from the Wenger and went into battle. After 15 minutes, the 3 Spartan's had dismantled the toothy monster's 58 mouths just as my cupcakes were ready. The four of us enjoyed my marbled chocolate-vanilla cupcakes (with sprinkles) while counting the treasure and mocking the mouthless snake that lay before us.
After counting the treasure, I pulled out the Wenger's Millennium Falcon and obliterated the Spartans. Seriously, I obliterated Spartans with the Wenger. I think that alone is sufficient reason to get one! Anyway, Spartans suck at sharing.
I flew out of the cave in the Wenger's Millennium Falcon and crossed the River of Desolation just east of The Mountain of Despair. I was hungry, so I pulled out the Wenger's giant spider legion and they shot down 4 flying dragons with their dark matter tusk lasers. It was gorgeous cool. Lunch was alright.
I remembered the crocheted crosses the old ladies left me. Their memory must be honored. So, I went to my local vampire castle. If you recognise anything when it comes to Twilight, then you know that everything you once knew when it comes to vampires is altogether wrong. Inside the castle, there were dozens of tragically phony "glistening" vampires pining over this wimpy goth chick. The tension and virginity was so thick and everlasting that the only thing I could do was slay them all. I pulled out the Wenger's amusement system and played the primary Twilight movie. Mission... accomplished. I put the two crocheted crosses over the Vampire King's eyes. "You're welcome, old broads."
Now that I'm exceedingly bored, I pulled out the Wenger's hot air balloon and went to the moon. Moon men are gorgeous cool dudes.
I got to the moon just in time to catch the double sunset. I pulled out New York City from the Wenger and sat in the crown of the Statue of Liberty looking at the Moon's double sunset with a good deal of chicks I found and a couple moon men drinking burnt martinis. Again, moon men are finelooking cool dudes.
We partied all night inside this sweet party tent in the Wenger. Chicks love party tents. You wouldn't think a full wet bar would be something you'd ever use in a pocket knife, but it actually comes in handy. And it makes the Wenger - The Giant Knife worth it, even if you don't drink.
That's all I may do not forget from yesterday. The pictures later on were hilarious. I closely lost it when the penguins arrived. I ought to of gotten the Extreme Wenger because I didn't recognise the Arctic Circle was one of the tools. But even if you don't get a Wenger with the Arctic Circle... still worth getting. I highly commend it.
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